Wordless Wednesday: A Month Ago!

Raising Jeremiah: Playtime

Jeremiah is so much fun! He has been crawling for almost two months now and can seriously get around. He is pulling up on furniture, walls, people, toilets, beds and anything else that seems to work. He loves peek-a-boo and will initiate it. He has the cutest laugh, and the cutest forced laugh, you have ever heard. He loves to read books, walk in the grass, brush his two little teeth and explore new places.

And, boy, we love having him around!

Last week when I was drying the sheets over some chairs Joel made Jeremiah his first quality tent. He crawled around and through it for a good 30 minutes and played hide-and-seek with Joel. So. Much. Fun. I love watching them play and laugh together.

Raising Jeremiah: Discipline Part 1- Types

A couple of weeks ago Joel and I could tell that a new phase of parenting was upon us- discipline of punishment and correction. We knew it would come, but it is difficult to know exactly what to do as new parents. We must rely so much upon the wisdom of the Lord!

There are two types of discipline and we want to be faithful to do both with our children. So many parents wait to correct and train their children until there is an urgent conflict. They hastily punish out of annoyance or anger and then wonder why their children are unruly. I am not saying we will raise perfect children perfectly. I do believe that with the guidance of the Holy Spirit we can raise children with discipline that honors Him.

dis·ci·pline–noun

1. training to act in accordance with rules; drill: military discipline.

2. activity, exercise, or a regimen that develops or improves a skill; training.

3. punishment inflicted by way of correction and training.

raining

The first two definitions for discipline are alike in the sense that it involves a proactive training to develop discipline. The only way to learn to do something well is by practicing, we all know that, and the same is true with teaching a child to obey.

The third definition for discipline is a result of direct disobedience. It means that there is a consequence for not following the expectations of the required discipline mentioned in the first two definitions.

Discipline of the first category begins, whether you realize it, in the womb as the baby begins to understand the characteristics of the mother. The growing baby is not oblivious to patterns, which is especially true once they can begin to hear what is happening in the outside world. What are those sounds? Voices? Are they arguing? Are they kind? Is she singing? The baby can begin to experience the routine of your day- a hot shower, the hair dryer, the TV, music, etc. The most basic, yet foundational, type of discipline has begun even before you hold your baby in your arms!

I could go on and on about this because I loved being pregnant and finding ways to begin building this new relationship with my baby. Looking back I wish I had done a lot more, but I am happy for what I did do all the same. I am not a talker, but I tried to do even more talking to the baby while at the same time touching my belly to somehow communicate that I was talking to them. We sang aloud more than normal. Jeremiah would become extremely active when he heard Joel singing- it was amazing! We also read the Bible aloud and Joel would pray near my growing midsection for baby to hear.

The greatest discipline we could EVER ingrain in our children is a love for God, His Word and a love for daily communing with Him. This discipline must first be in my life, though, if I am ever going to influence my children to do the same. I am not a fan of telling my child to "do what I say and not what I do." First, it is not Biblical. Second, would you want to listen to a fat and lazy Drill Sargent tell you to run 5 miles? Me either.

We were able to watch a few seasons of the Duggars on Netflix and we respect their parenting for so many reasons. The Duggars, while the older children were practicing their musical instruments, would sit the 2-3 year old in a chair to listen. The child was supposed to sit there without talking, wiggling or getting down. Mrs. Duggar explained that they want to train their children to do things like sitting through a performance, church service, waiting at a doctor's office, etc., before they were actually put in those situations. Instead of dragging a screaming child out of church they are hoping to build discipline, as well as obedience, into the child before a crisis breaks out. If the child started crying or got down they were able to correct and instruct in an environment that allowed focused training.

We know this is true in other areas of life, so why do we not apply this to parenting? No soldier is taught to handle an AK47 during the middle of active combat. There is no word to describe how foolish that would be. Why do we do this to our poor children? We get angry with them, grab their arms and jerk them out of the room when some extra time and care to training at home (or in other less urgent situations) would probably solve 95% of the problem.

The second part of discipline, where punishment and consequences for disobedient behavior must be enforced, is much easier to confront when the first type of discipline has been instituted. The child clearly knows what a healthy and obedient life looks like. They already know the boundaries and the consequences for crossing them have been lovingly established. They know basic things like touching the hot stove will cause pain to in-depth realities that yelling at mommy means a spanking.

We have tried hard to begin the first type of discipline with Jeremiah already. Since he was born we talk with him constantly about what we are doing and why. He may not have understood it at 2 weeks old, but the consistent reminders of what is going on has been good training, I believe, for both us and him. It has put me in the habit of explaining things to him and now, at 8 months old, I can see the fruit of that simple discipline. He knows the word "wait." He knows that I will pick him up- after I am done brushing my teeth. He knows we sing and play in the morning.

As good as he is, though, I am beginning to realize that this will take a lot of work. It will not be easy at all. He is starting to push boundaries. I must be disciplined with both types by my Heavenly Father so that I can be a faithful parent. I cannot be lazy if I expect my child to work. I cannot get frustrated for grumpy attitudes when I waver in the same way. I must be as patient with our children as God is with me.

Coming Soon: Raising Jeremiah: When to Say No!

Not Enough Time

Whenever I am absent on my blog it is not because I have nothing to write about. It is usually because I have SO many thoughts racing through my mind that I cannot pin them down into coherent posts.

Hopefully this will be remedied soon.

Here are some things I have been thinking about, and thus, would like to write about at some point in the near future-

1. Usama Bin Laden's death

2. Slaves of Christ, servant of others

3. Parenting

4. Is Seminary Biblical?

5. Money saving ideas

Until then, may the love of Christ compel you to abandon yourself to Him.

M is for: Monday, Ministry and Marriage

(Some family fun last week!)

I am so stinkin' tired emotionally, mentally, spiritually and physically. Last week was draining in so many different ways and I just wish I could take a day and sleep.

That is not possible, but one can dream!

Yesterday was really, really, really long (welcome to the new normal). We were out all day at church, my parents and then back to church (insert YAWN). It is exhausting to take care of a 7 month old at church (he is not in the nursery yet), do normal Junior High activities (of which I lead a game that went pathetically wrong), talk with 76 people (which drains me after about the third conversation), sit through the second service (a great message!), attend a meeting (for our mission trip to Pagosa Springs) and do most of that with an empty stomach (when will I learn my 7AM breakfast will NOT last me until a 3PM lunch and bring a snack?!?!). We headed back to church at 6PM after spending time with my family (yay!) to lead the Junior High Discipleship Groups (almost done and they have gone so well!) and attend the evening of prayer with the church (the D-Group students participated, too- what a blessing to watch them grow).

We left the church at 10:15PM.

Welcome to ministry.

Marriage and ministry is a wonderful thing, too. It was a taxing day (no pun intended, but laugh if you must). When we got home last night we were talking about how satisfying it is to serve the Lord. What else would we want to do together?

A. See a movie (wasting $20 and 2.5 hours on junk)?
B. Go out to dinner (Chick-fil-A is our favorite date spot when we get the chance)?
C. Lounge around the house (which we do on occasion, of course)?
D. Serve the Lord (and see eternal blessings all around)?

Definitely D!

(Oh, and 6 days until our second anniversary!)

Epic Fail: Sponge Sanitation

It sounded like such a great idea.

The tip on the website seemed brilliant:
put damp sponge in the microwave for 3-5 minutes every night to sanitize it.

So, Monday night, I tried it.

I will not be doing that every night.

In fact- I will never do that again unless I want a burnt sponge, a house full of plastic scented smoke (that is still lingering three days later) and an evening of frustration (not to mention a headache from the stench).

Epic fail.

(Come to find out this is epic fail #2 of the same brand. I did not think it was possible to have two epic fails of the same nature, but my mom assures me I tried this several years ago and the same thing happened. You would think one would remember the smell and never attempt sponge sanitation via microwave ever again.)
I am grateful for a husband that encourages me to laugh at myself!

Raising Jeremiah: A Series

"But if serving the LORD seems undesirable to you,

then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve,
whether the gods your ancestors served beyond the Euphrates,
or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living.
But as for me and my household, we will serve the LORD.”
Joshua 24:15

I LOVE being a mother. Have you guessed that yet? I LOVE BEING A MOTHER! It is absolutely amazing to carry a child inside your body, nurturing and caring for them, as they are hidden in the secret place. It is a delight to experience the full pain of labor and delivery as you bring them into this world.

We LOVE being parents. There are no words to describe looking at the small scrunched up face of your flesh and blood for the very first time. Oh, I could go on and on with this list. It truly is unbelievable to be a parent.

Today Jeremiah was giggling as I was tickling him and I just had to sigh. What a blessing from the Lord! He is such a gift. He is a reward (Psalm 127) that we definitely do not deserve.

The last 15 or so months, as I was pregnant and since Jeremiah has been born, have been a time of accelerated growth for me. I have had to take all I once dreamed of and put it into action. It was finally my time to experience morning sickness, heartburn, crazy dreams, labor, delivery, nursing and child raising!

There have been so many supportive people in our life who have given Godly counsel and advice. There have been a lot of people who have asked us a myriad of questions. I have been pregnant with several good friends (Dawn, Darrah and Katie!) and walked the journey of motherhood with them.
Still, Joel and I are different. We always have been, I guess, and we knew that raising children would set us apart in more ways from the mainstream- even among Christians. We have "radical" ideas, as some call it, and as others would say are "too idealistic." Maybe. Maybe not.

As with all things Joel and I want to be fully surrendered to the Lord in our decision making processes and what we do. We want to make sure that we have sought the Lord in all things instead of just following what everyone does. It may be that in the end we do what most people do, but we still want to know that the direction came from God Himself!

Romans 14, at the very end, after talking about the weak and the strong follower of Jesus, in relation to food sacrificed to idols, states, "and everything that does not come from faith is sin." We get focused so much on the issue of not causing another brother to stumble that many times we completely miss this absolute fact. Romans 14:23 is a verse for ALL followers of Jesus, about ALL decisions in life, across ALL cultures and for ALL time. If it is not done by faith it is sin. Hebrews 11:6 also tells us, "And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to Him must believe that He exists and that He rewards those who earnestly seek Him."

Those are just two verses that remind me to take all my decisions before the Lord before moving forward! I want to please the Lord, not sin and do all things by faith!!!

Many people have asked why we did, do and plan on doing certain things like natural family planning, womb bonding, out-loud pregnancy Scripture memory, natural childbirth, delayed and limited vaccinations, co-sleeping, feeding on demand, attachment parenting, delayed non-parent care-giving, baby wearing, natural solid food timing, baby potty training, realistic toys, spanking, homeschooling, etc., ETC, ETC. I would like to begin sharing why and how we are parenting!

(I never want to cause you, my reader (whoever you may be) to stumble or to feel that I am judging you for your decisions. As I stated here, I just want a place to share, digest and encourage you to, at the base of it, surrender your lives to the Lord- in ALL things. When you read my thoughts on parenting please take it at face value. And, for your home, seek the Lord!)

We are Jeremiah's parents. We have been given the role of raising him. We will answer for what we did or did not do in leading him to know God. We do not take that lightly! We are also not perfect. We am new to this parenting thing. I get really tired and drained. There are days that I have no idea what I am doing. I told Joel last night that I can see how parents can so easily get lazy. I also realize that what I share on this blog may not be what ends up happening in our home. I also know that Arrow #2, when the Lord blesses us again, will be a completely different child! I will probably have to write a whole new series about them!

Parenting is HARD work.

Maybe by expressing some of my thoughts and our convictions here I can encourage you while at the same time challenging myself to really think about what we are doing! I also want it to be a place where we can share ideas. You may have learned something along the way that we need to know!!! (Like HOW in the WORLD do you know when a 6 month old is being curious, playful or defiant? God give us wisdom!)

If you are a parent, the key is always prayer. We cannot do this without the working of the Holy Spirit in our lives! I hope to look back at these posts one day and smile... what an adventure!

Worldess Wednesday: Old, but Good!

Wordless Wednesday

Pride: The Childbirth Method

"Do nothing from rivalry or conceit,
but in humility
count others more significant than yourselves."

Philippians 2:3

God has been showing me areas in my life where pride has so easily and cunningly crept in to set up camp. The more I am sensitive to pride in my own the life the more I see it in everyone else as well (which can be both good- and- bad). Pride takes so many shapes and forms it is simply unbelievable.

A few weeks ago I was at Katie's baby shower and came home ranting to Joel about how pride and childbirth, when combined, can be so infuriating! First, though, a picture:

She is so CUTE pregnant!

Anyway.

Whenever you have a group of mothers together you will probably hear something about their children and chances are that sooner or later the topic of childbirth will surface. I am sure it has been this way for at least a couple thousand years. Now that I have been through the whole process of pregnancy, labor, delivery and five whole months of motherhood I can understand why it becomes the center of many conversations. It is an amazing and life-changing experience.

Yet, in everything, pride finds a way to wiggle itself into hearts and eventually out into conversation. We all have had our own experience and we want so desperately for others to understand why we did what we did in our childbirth.

Epidural vs. Natural. C-Section vs. Vaginal. Long labor vs. Short labor. Bradley vs. Lamaze. Doctor vs. Mid-wife. Formula vs. Breastfed. Hospital vs. Home Birth. And the list could go on and on.... and on.

It does not matter which side you fall on in any of the list above- you have pride about it! Those that did go all natural have pride that they did. People who did not go natural call those that went all natural the prideful ones and in that statement itself is a truckload of pride. I will spare you more of the types of comments I have heard from both sides! They are sometimes brutal!

I am not sure how to say what I am thinking without sounding incredibly harsh.

What if we, as women, learned to hold our tongue? What if we, when we feel slighted by another woman's childbirth story, would just listen? What if we applauded those who went all natural and listened to why some decided to have a c-section? What if we did not call people who get epidurals wimps and those who went without medication stuck up?

What if we prayed about all our decisions? What if we obeyed the Lord's will for our lives and then would confidently abide in His love? What if we were humble enough to just keep quiet?

When I think about my childbirth story I smile. I have so many precious memories in my heart and mind about that night. I am excited that God answered my prayers. I am incredibly thankful for my husband who cheered me on in the wee hours of the morning. And, I am SO grateful for a healthy baby boy.

There are some situations, like baby showers, where I wish I could tell my story without fear of being interrupted by those who have a different experience than me. I wish I could share my life without wondering what people would think. I wish I could give women advice without being seen as a childbirth nazi.

There are so many topics for women that we could discuss when it comes to pride. It may not be childbirth for you. It may be homemaking. Cooking. Time-management. Money. Appearance.

Take your pick.

Above all, I wish to see pride rooted out of my life because as a woman of God it has no place and is not welcome in my heart.

"Do nothing from rivalry or conceit,
but in humility
count others more significant than yourselves."

Philippians 2:3

Wordless Wednesday: A To Do List

Wordless Wednesday (on Thursday): A Glimpse of Tuesday

Wordless Wednesday

Arrow #1

The news of Arrow #1 was thrust into cyberspace (thanks to Facebook) on May 9, 2010: Mother's Day!!! Since the world, or all who really care, now know I thought it was time to start tracking some things on the blog like Katie does.

How Far Along: 22 weeks
Size of baby: 11 inches and almost 1 pound
Total Weight Gain/ Loss: 8 pounds
Maternity Clothes: Just started wearing them! My mom and a few friends have given me some shirts. I have purchased two things so far!
Gender: Surprise!
Movement: Baby is active first thing in the morning, mid-afternoon and as soon as I lay down at night.
Food Cravings: I really do not have any yet...
What I Miss: Ultimate Frisbee
Sleep: Hips are aching, but otherwise I am sleeping great!
Symptoms: I could do without the heartburn. Seriously.
Best Moment of This Week: Swimming last night!
What I am Looking Forward To: Being able to feel the baby (not just movements).
Doctor: My next doctor's appointment is Wednesday May 26.

I cannot believe, first, that I am pregnant and second, that I am over half-way! Lord willing, in 18 weeks we will be holding our first child in our arms. How incredibly amazing and unbelievable!

Yesterday I was watching some birthing videos, which I have done before, but this time it was different. When the little baby was laid on the mother's chest and cried for the first time I got teary and could not shake the emotions for the rest of the day. So very soon that will be Joel and I with our baby!

The Lord is gracious. He gives strength and wisdom. I trust in Him to fill all the areas where I feel so incapable. This child is His. He has given them to us to teach us more about Himself. I rejoice in that and will embrace all that is to come with confidence in Him!!!