Friday, January 26, 2007

Are YOU a Coloradan (at heart)?

Everywhere, it seems, people are complaining or bragging about the weather conditions in their respective climate. Complaining there is too much snow; bragging there is so much snow. Complaining they do not have snow; bragging that it is warm. Yesterday we, those of us in the Rocky Mountain Front Range, received 5 more inches of snow. Some would say that as a complaint while others would say it boastfully.

Last week I would have complained. The week before that I was indifferent. In the week before that, I would have been bragging. Now, though, it is becoming normal.

Ice everywhere, ten foot buldoze generated snow mountains in parking lots, getting up extra early to scrape off your car, fighting traffic in low visibility, wearing three layers of clothes, drinking hot beverages at every meal, abiding in single digit temperatures and seeing WHITE where ever you look!

The snow Wednesday was beautiful. Ben, Ann Marie and I had a great time after the Chris Tomlin concert inspecting the individual snowflakes. It was the first time I have EVER been able to see, with my own eyes, the unique characteristics of individual snowflakes. It was so cold that they were not melting. They were sticking to the car window, giving us a perfect inspection field.

I cannot even begin to describe the beauty of what I saw. So I won't even try. All I will say is, "Blessed be the name of the Lord; He who created the monsterous galaxies in the universe also fashioned gazillions of snowflakes on Wesdnesady... and Thursday... and Friday. I love You, Creator!"

So, as a tribute to the state of Colorado, my home for 14 years and, if I may say so, the best state ever... please read on:

You know you are from Colorado if....

You'll eat ice cream in the winter.
(High temp yesterday was 16 and I had ice cream)

When the weather report says it's going to be 40 degrees, you shave your legs and wear a skirt.(Girls only, please! I saw a guy in shorts and flip-flops when it was 30 degrees last week...)

It snows 5 inches and you don't expect school to be cancelled.
(Unless there is 10 inches on the ground already... or 25 for that matter)

You'll wear flip flops every day of the year, regardless of temperature.
(Yep, pretty much)

You have no accent at all, but can hear other people's. And then you make fun of them.
(We don't have acccents, seriously, and we do tease a little...)

"Humid" is over 25%.
(We have to drink our humidity if we want it)

Your sense of direction is: Toward the mountains and Away from the mountains.
(If I EVER move someplace that is FLAT I will be LOST all the time. Everyone here says the same thing and if they lived somewhere else before having mountains they are not sure hoe they EVER got around without them. You never say, "Head west." You say, "Go towards the mountains.")

You say "the interstate" and everybody knows which one.
(Until I read this I had never thought about it, but it is incredibly true. The funny thing... there are a dozen interstates around, but somehow we just know!)

You think that May is a totally normal month for a blizzard, and you grew up planning your Halloween costumes around your coat.
(Hahahahahahaha... yep)

You know what the Continental Divide is and you have been there- several times.
(And you frequently talk about "the passes" and know in general where they are.)

You were tear gassed at college and you can't even remember why....something about football...
(HA HA. If you do not get that, you are not from Colorado.)

You've gone off-roading in a vehicle that was never intended for such activities.
(SO true!)

You own an SUV. Or two. Or three. And you brag or complain about gas mileage.
(Our household only has one.)

You always know the elevation of where you are.
(Of course... who doesn't? Elevation where I am at right now is 5,544 feet above sea level. Where I live is 5,670 feet above sea level.)

You wake up to a beautiful, 80 degree day and you wonder if it's going to snow tomorrow.
(In the fall and spring it is possible... and I have warn shorts one day, sweaters the next and shorts on the third day.)

You get frustrated when people confuse Wyoming with Kansas, Nebraska, Colorado, or "one of those other big square states out west."
(YES.)

When you hear that the Chiefs and the Raiders are having bad seasons, you laugh uncontrollably.
(Well, maybe not me, but everyone else does. There are city riots between these fans and Bronco freaks too!)

Every movie theater has military and student discounts.
(Yep.)

Everybody wears jeans to church.
(Yep.)

It is common for your out-of-town guests to faint/throw-up from altitude sickness on a picnic to the mountains.
(Yep. Dawn, are you excited about coming to visit???)

When people out East tell you they have mountains in their state too, you just laugh.
(Pretty much.)

You go anywhere else on the planet and the air feels "sticky" and you notice the sky is no longer blue.
(Ahhh... I love Colorado!)

You know how to get to Focus on the Family, Garden of the Gods, Boulder, all ski resorts, Casa Bonita and the 16th Street Mall.
(and, if you are a Christian you know how to get to Riverside Baptist Church! You remember Rick Ferguson and you know how, and when, he died.)

You know how to pronounce Berthoud, Genesee, Pueblo and Vail.

You laugh at people who have all matching ski gear and mutter, "Tourist."
(Lepard print outifts are my favorite and I mutter, "Californian." I love people from California, Dawn, but no one else wears lepard print gear.. save for maybe New Yorkers.)

You own 10 pairs of gloves, wool socks, 3 pair of long underwear and jackets to match anything.
(Just 10?)

If none of the above made sense to you, then you are probably not from Colorado!

Now, can anyone tell me what the proper order is for the following (they are not in order):
1- Scrape ice on windshield.
2- Brush snow off of windshield.
3- Brush snow off of hood.
4- Pull windshield wipers up off of windshield.
5- Start car.
6- Turn heater inside car on.
7- Turn defrost on.
8- Get in car to leave.

If you can put them in the right order you...
1- ...asked a Coloradan for help.
2- ...are really smart.
3- ...are a really good guesser.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

here's my order:

5, 6/7 (I have a combination in my car), 4, 2, 3 (which I never do anyway), 1, 8. 9--begin the training run for the automobile olympics sport of driving the ice moguls through the street.

I shall be forever speechless at the snowflakes and hand of God in that evening!

Dawn said...

I think I guessed correctly, though I may have misplaced when to put the windshield wipers up. And yes I am excited to come to Colorado someday (there's that word again). And I'd never have leopard pring snow gear...I'd just borrow some from you or a friend -- why buy when you know you're not a cold weather vacationer? :-)